Friday, March 12, 2004

Mimi and Kate to hit the city tomorrow

Sorry I've been publishing on a lighter schedule, but my 16 year old little sister and her best friend Kate arrive tomorrow from Texas for their Spring Break, so we've been cleaning the apartment and preparing ourselves mentally and spiritually. Wish us luck.

Wow. I'm watching 20/20 right now and the lense on Barbara Walter's vanity cam must have an inch of petroleum jelly smeared on it. It also bathes her in this gauzy light so that she glows brighter than Roma Downey when she reveals herself as a messenger of God on Touched by an Angel.

We call Touched by an Angel "Inappropriately Touched By an Angel," because watching that show is like being molested yet having your body betray you by getting aroused against your will. The plot lines are so treacly, simplistic, and manipulative, and have such sinister Christian Right agenda undertones, that you feel like the biggest sucker for even watching it, but somehow you can't stop yourself. The first time I watched it was with Elizabeth & her brother Dan. The episode guest starred Winona Judd and the plot involved some adorable little boy who was dying of cancer. He had made a little to do list that he wouldn't let anybody see, and at the end of show Winona is belting out some country spiritual and this big crowd of people who have gathered around the little boy's house are all swaying and singing along together in this giant hootenanny of joy and praise. Then that actor who plays Death takes the little boy's hand and leads him away and you finally get to see the little boy's list, and the last entry is "Go to Heaven," which has miraculously been crossed off. So there we all were sitting on the couch weeping, too embarrassed to even look at each other because we felt so dirty and full of shame that we could be that weak and easily emotionally manipulated.

So, we made a little game out of it to sit down each Sunday and see if we could make it through an episode without crying, and we never did. One time we thought we were home free, but then Death comes for someone completely unexpectedly right at the end of the show and it was like a sneaky sucker punch right in the gut. That show sent me into a full blown crying jag, the kind where you have to go breathe into a paper bag and throw some cold water on your face to get yourself back together.

Thankfully, Valerie Bertinelli's addition to the cast finally broke the show's grip on us, but channel surfing is dangerous because if I happen to stumble on an episode on Pax TV then I'm helpless to stop myself from getting sucked back in.

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